Friday, November 7, 2014

Wearing Confidence

While updating my blog, I came across some photos that were very disturbing to me. My Mary Kay Challenge. I don’t remember my skin ever looking that bad. EVER. 

When reminiscing on anything you never remember it to be exactly the way it was. You either think it was way worse than it really was, or better than it was. Just like when there are others involved, chances are you have different stories about the same event. I am just glad that I don’t remember my skin being that terrible, which means it must not have affected me that much.

By “not affecting me” I mean it must not have impacted my self esteem in a big way because I still went to class, I still didn’t wear makeup all the time. I know other people don’t really care because I don’t really care about what other people’s skin is like. Sure I could be envious about someone’s “flawless” appearance, but let’s be real. NO ONE has flawless skin, not even celebrities. We’ve all learned that now thanks to high-definition. But does that make any of them less gorgeous? No, in fact, that makes them relatable. Their pedestal that they have been placed on for being rich and famous and “perfect” has just been lowered. Because they are human, not some airbrushed robot.

Now let me step off my soap box and get back to my skin. 

My acne probably flared up due to stress of a new environment and new eating habits and all things college. But that didn’t stop me from living life, I may have looked terrible, but I still had a blast that first semester. I had become aware of my flare ups, enough to make an appointment with the dermatologist back home. But I didn’t stop living. I didn’t let my appearance, or what I thought my appearance was, keep me from trying new things. Sure, it may have affected me a little bit, but I don’t believe that confidence comes from the surface. 

Your outward appearance can attribute to your self confidence, but true confidence comes from within and you can choose to wear it or not.

Of course I am glad that my skin has cleared up, I am actually extremely grateful that it has cleared up. But I don’t believe my life would be that much different if I still had red bumps splattered across my face. I would still have the same friends. My grades would not have change. Nothing drastic would come out of it.

I say all of that to say this; having “flawless” skin would be ideal, but acne or braces or a weird birthmark or whatever you consider to be an imperfection should not stop you from living life to the fullest.

Here is a little progress picture… top right to bottom right is all during first semester, and then the left was taken this week. No makeup, besides some leftover eyeliner and mascara. 

“A face without freckles is like a sky without the clouds”- Natasha Bedingfield

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